Mother And Teenage Daughter: 15 Tips For Understanding

Aug 29, 2011 No Comments by

A number of mothers meets on the wall of misunderstanding on the part of daughters that come at a difficult age – 14 years and older. Between them is formed chasm that an inability to establish a dialogue can distance the mothers and daughters and vice versa, lead to the fact that a teenager will never be able to trust innermost thoughts of mother, she found solace and ask for advice.

We’ve prepared 15 tips to help moms understand that teenage daughter has grown and needs not only in traditional dress, feed, wash, learn lessons, put to bed, but in a candid conversation on the souls. And not from a position of mother-daughter, just like a woman.

1. Try to remember yourself at that age, in what is now your daughter. And the honest answer to a question – and always had an understanding with your mother? Do you not want to discuss with her what bothered? And that stopped: the fear of a quarrel, that my mother would understand it all wrong or something else?

2. Study circle of daughter’s friends, if you have not done this before. This is a very important point to be able to understand the sentiments that are swarming in her young mind.

3. If the daughter is easily influenced by someone else, you need to understand why this is happening. Maybe she has low self-esteem?

4. More often wondered what the girl thinks, what topics are relevant to it. It is not excluded that much of what she heard, you can put out of composure or even shock. However, it is because something is missing, but in your power to renew the spiritual connection with the child.

5. Do not criticize your daughter because she spends much time in the mirror. During this period, many girls feel ugly ducklings against those ideals of beauty that hit the glossy magazines. Help daughter to emphasize their natural beauty, encourage natural remedies that can cleanse her skin and then from pimples. Suppose you come into the tradition to do together on weekends manicure, cosmetic facial masks and hair.

6. Adjust the use of makeup. Often the girls at this age it is so overused that resemble ladies of easy virtue. To daughter was rummaging in your purse, give her a personal and refill means, adapted to the young age.

7. You have to understand that daughter much charge you an example, even if they do not admit it. She wants to see her mother a beautiful, stylish, energetic and interesting. And if you’re as immersed in family matters or other concerns, and shopping is not your element – a young girl can not talk to you about fashion trends. Your task – to become a symbol for her femininity and elegance that no teenager ran as a pool with her head in the perfectionism of youth fashion with unimaginable in your opinion dresses.

8. Do not go on about the possible applications daughter about what you propose, clothes or shoes she did not like. Most likely, she been reading fashion magazines and want to see in your wardrobe only branded items that are her idols. Explain to her that is fashionable – not always pretty. Let her understand the difference between style and fashion fleeting flash.

9. Noticed your daughter bad habits ? If your family does not smoke or drink alcohol more often than just on holidays, so the girl gives in someone else’s influence you may want to offer her a more healthy option like a vape starter kit. In any case not arrange her scandalous scenes. Call for straight talk, ask to talk about the reasons that forced her daughter to try a cigarette or alcohol. And then demonstrate negative effects of these bad habits.

10. At this age, interest begins opposite sex. Many mothers hush topic of relations between boys and girls. In the future, do not blame themselves for the results of her silence, start a conversation with your ​​daughter, ask her opinion of young people around. And if you hear of sympathy for someone in a confidential form and without instructions tell how to build relationships at such a young age. Make it clear to your daughter that you understand it, but hoping for a reason. Only in this case it will not deceive you. Make sure that the issues of early sexual development is better to discuss with you, not with a friend. A much more correct information of interest to get you than the Internet. Do not hesitate to speak with your daughter on these sensitive topics. If you can, then your credibility is very high.

11. You must be regulated by the amount of pocket money. Give your daughter a choice – to spend money. If the purchase is made, and wishes have not been exhausted, remind her about it. This will teach teenagers planning and understanding of the price of money. This is especially true for those parents with a daughter – an only child.

12. If the daughter is talking to you as a friend of – do not insist on changing attitudes. After all, it stresses that the child sees you congenial person to whom it is easy to feel. Regular statement on your part, “but I’m Mom” ​​may create a barrier and break the thread of trust.

13. Do not try to “mold” in this age of your daughter that she really does not fit. For example, if you do not know how to play guitar, but wanted to learn all your life, do not force it to make your daughter. In response, you can get an aggressive reaction of resistance. It is better to make out her interest in something, and gradually develop it.

14. Be interested in books and movies, who reads and watches your daughter. It is possible to understand her inner world. Maybe you think they have nothing interesting, useful and developmental. But to find out, look at your daughter for something interesting out of her innovations. Joint viewing movies can rediscover the tradition, lost in an age as your daughter is no longer interested in cartoons.

15. Objectively, the answer to the question – and comfortable in your home. What are your relations with her husband, as father to daughter – the main man in her life, which largely shapes its attitudes towards young people. If the parents love each other and are respectful, then the girl will try on this model of behavior for themselves. Think about how your relationship with your teenage daughter are different from those councils. If fundamental changes – changes that meant we had to hurry to get back understanding. Restoring trust – not an easy process, but possible.

If much of the above normal for your mother-daughter tandem, we can rejoice over you, and wish not to lose it in the future.

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